White, quiet and loud

When snow starts to fall and temperatures finally drop so low that it doesn’t melt right away it gets quiet in front of our normally noisy street. Cars drive slowly or don’t drive at all and the snow muffles all the sound. I really like that!

This time the snow grew so thick that the public transport had to stop due to the great amount of snow filling up all the tram tracks. Well, biking wasn’t an option either so I was walking to the rehearsal room which takes more than one hour each way. Sometimes I enjoyed the slow way of traveling, seeing new things and feeling the positivities of moving a lot. But then my rehearsal time was shortened quite a bit. And my impatience grew… So many things I want to do, so much to play, so much to compose, so much to sing, so much to learn! And I’m stuck with walking.

And it’s loud. Loud inside my head. Thousand voices shouting. So much to do, so much to learn, so much to reach, or not..? And life slips away, even though it’s great. Well, I am enjoying my life, very grateful indeed. Living in a warm place, enjoying great food and full of music inside my head and heart and body and soul and what else you wanna call it! And still: Hasty. It’s the speed of our time, maybe, that I can’t run along. Maybe it’s a pressure I’m manly causing myself. But wherever it comes from: It is there and it is f***** annoying!

I went for a walk today, not to my rehearsal room, just into the park, no goal, just a little warming sunbath. And trying to relax my tensed jaw… Then I was thinking about how it feels just to walk and nothing else. Feeling the body, each muscle, the weight shifting from one leg to the other, the cold wind on my skin, the warm sun too. And nothing else.

Wow.

I feel like I have so much to learn. But still, most of all perhaps, I should change my way of learning. Learn to relax. Learn to enjoy. Each moment.

I wish you all a great weekend and deeply hope that you enjoy your moments, one by one!

Greetings with this video which I finished this week!

music recorded in May 2020

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